Bookshelf

I knew that I was something
But now I don't know what
Thought I was important
But I realize I'm just dust.

Lots of shit going on right now. I'm pissed off at people, and the world is spinning, and I think what I just wrote at the beginng up there (^) is going to become a poem. I'll post it later. I wrote a couple other ones yesterday and one today, but I don't feel like getting them now. Maybe later, or tomorrow. Anyway.

So I had my party tonight and it was good fun, but I do'nt feel like talking about happy things right now. So I'll tell you about that later, or tomorrow. Anyway.

I've been finding out way too many things through other people, and it bothers me that hardly anyone talks to me anymore and really tells me things. The only people I can really talk to right now are Blondie, Z-Man, and Kei. The first two are the ones who always tell me things, and Kei and I can talk about anything. I'm not going to start mentioning names, though it would really only be one name, and I hope (s)he knows who (s)he is, because this needs to be fixed fast for more than just my sake. Things are really starting to get fucked up. What everyone knew about me... my secret that was divulged, is coming out everywhere.

I'm tired of followers. But now I'm going to be hypocritical for one moment, and say (hint hint) I'm tired of the "game" of truth. *Big red flag goes up* No one is paying attention! I've done all this fighting for nothing. I think I'm going to retry being reclusive and see what happens. So note to all my "friends" out there, if you really actually want to be my friend, call me and tell me, please, cause I need some reassurance right now. And some of you, if you call we're going to have to have a long talk about what the fuck our relationship is, because I don't know anymore. I'm confused and alone and it sux ass, worse than some other really shitty things. I just want some honesty.